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 Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?

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How would you choose to get married?
Love Marriage
75%
 75% [ 38 ]
Arranged Marriage
25%
 25% [ 13 ]
Total Votes : 51
 

AuthorMessage
smriti d

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PostSubject: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:33 pm

This is my all-time favourite topic of discussion-which one wud u go for?love or arranged?
although there aren't any statistics to prove which one is the more successful path to take,i would like to address this question to today's youth.
Are u ok wid ur parents setting u up with someone whom they feel is more
suitable to ur temperament?
Or do u believe ur the one who shud make the most important decision of ur life?

personally,i think that its impossible for me to spend the rest of my life wid a stranger whom i've known for jus a couple of hours.
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Vineet Modi
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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:39 pm

Hehe.. this is an interesting topic for discussion Smriti! I have added a poll to it, so that people can vote and we know the results!

I would go for Love Marriages anyday! Even though I can't deny that arranged marriages sometimes have their own advantages - lesser expectations, family traditions, it avoids inter-racial breeding etc etc. But the advantages of love marriages are WAY more than a formal arranged piece of shit!


Last edited by on Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
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smriti d

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:53 pm

Ya daz true!!N as my Dad always says,if an arranged marriage dsnt work out,u can always blame ur parents!!!!
N thanx for addin the poll ya..i jus cudnt get it done!!


Last edited by on Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
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vaibhav

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:55 pm

love marriage for sure...its faaar more interesting.
and if it gets screwed up, i'll kno who to blame.
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Ritwik

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 12:08 am

Vineet wrote:
it avoids inter-racial breeding etc etc. But the advantages of love marriages are WAY more than a formal arranged piece of shit!

"Inter racial breeding"? Are you fascist or what ?
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Vineet Modi
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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 12:11 am

Ritwik wrote:
"Inter racial breeding"? Are you fascist or what ?

Haha, I knew someone would ask that. No I'm not a racist/facist. Infact I detest racists of any sort! I just don't like the idea of Inter-racial breeding. Its not healthy for a community/family/race in my opinion. I know its debatable, but that's just my point of view.
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smriti d

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Female Number of posts : 150
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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 12:19 am

On 1 side im with vineet,but not completely...
"Inter-racial" breeding does spare children of such families a lot of complications and difficult decisions.
And however much famous couples may advocate such mixed marriages,they are very difficult to commit to n put up with.

On the other hand,such marriages are very important for the integrity of a nation like ours.bcoz children from such families help spread religious tolerance among the younger generation.
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Pragya

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 1:45 am

well there is nothing bad with inter-racial marriages..anyway that is my opinion..well I would go for love marriage.because you know the person you are going to spend your life with..we are aware about our partner's habits and way of living..so it is much easier to adjust.
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simrandewan

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Female Number of posts : 87
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Registration date : 2007-07-07

PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 4:04 am

umm.. i choose not to comment on inter- racial marriages n racism.... but according to me love marriages r more comfortable than arranged ones for obvious reasons... n cuming to think of it, v dont thnik abt whom v r gonna blame if this duznt work out before marriage do v?
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jyotsna

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 9:50 am

well smriti i completely agree wid u...i wud go for love marriages only...i just wonder how people can spend their whole life wid some1 they don even know...how can they trrust them completely...well they r bound to do that....and if u already know the person then there r more chances that u have good understanding and adjustment..........its good that u raised this ques....
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Vineet Modi
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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 6:23 pm

ahaha no body has voted for arranged marriage so far.. I won't be surprised if some of you show this thread to your parents in case you want to get married to your loved ones haha!
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jamshed

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Registration date : 2007-07-28

PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:12 pm

i agree! spending ur whole life with a person whom u hav just known 4 a couple of days n shared ur views about dis diplomatic world is all bull shit!!
i believe that even if its n arranged marriage,the boy n girl must spend @ least a month 2 noe each other really well-their gud habit n bad.Just fakin ur character 2 ur life partner is a common curse of arranged marriage
2 sum it up....even if u opt 4 arranged marriage,make sure that it turns in2 love by d time u tie the knot!!


Last edited by on Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:33 pm; edited 1 time in total
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smriti d

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:15 pm

lol!gud one vini!!!
thanx for such a gud response guys!But I would like to point out that arranged marriage here doesnt necessarily mean that the couple has to be forced or something.What if they ask their parents to find someone for them?A lot of people are to busy these days to find love(like me!)...what do ya guys hafta say about that?
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jamshed

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:22 pm

ya thats a gud point,but i believe dat only those ppl ask deir parents 2 find sum1 4 dem who r not confident enough on their own decisions....n im not 1 of em,btw smriti dis is not d age 2 find true love...i' wont think of findin my partner until n unless i complete my masters...
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smriti d

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:37 pm

well...daz subjective...n btw jamboy,im not lukin around for love rite now...but waz d harm if u do find it?u neva know waz gonna happen to u in d next 2 hours..!!!

N ya,who knows,cupid might strike durin a so-called fixed up meetin in an arranged marriage scenario...n neway these days its more like a global dating service u know...
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jamshed

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 8:52 pm

there's chances of gettin harmed if u find true love @ dis age.as we r students,there's a high possibility of breakin off with ur partner by the time we attain the age of marriage,not bcoz u'll be bored...coz there's r lot more important things in our life like building our career n standing @ ur own feet n in most of d cases ther's parental pressure so u cant talk 2 ur lovd 1 wen ur parents r around n its not always possible 2 meet ur love by lyin 2 ur parents....miscommunication is d cause of most of d brk offs...
as 4 me-i'll try mah best 2 dodge d cupid.lol!
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Nikhita

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sat Jul 28, 2007 9:36 pm

i am in for arranged marriage...i respect the fact the we need to know someone before we decide to spend our entire life with him/her, but still there's an equal chance of a love marriage breaking apart....what's the guarantee that the person you knew would remain the same always, and wouldn't change with time...

for me...if my parents think someone is good enough for me, i really wouldn't mind going in for the relationship...arrange marriages have their own charm...u step into this new world...you hav so much to know about the other person..there's mystery in the air...you give time and effort to build the relationship...everyday is a whole new day, which you don't know will bring what for u...unlyk in a love marriage where there is nothing left to explore...for me...m indifferent between the two...i'm not really hell bent upon marrying someone i love...i'd do whatever comes my way....
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nehagulati



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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sun Jul 29, 2007 3:25 am

'd say love marriages r perceived to b 'happier ending' ones more so cuz of the level of understandin thtz already bn built up. so, u don need 2 start rt 4m scratch to build up d trust tht u wud need to, in an arranged marriage. plus, u always have d feelin of tht sum1 bein ther by ur side no matr wht....!
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Nikhita

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Sun Jul 29, 2007 4:44 pm

well i do know of lots of love marriages which were 'perceived' to be happier endin g as a disaster..so i guess the happier debate can't be really done here...things will go wrong if they have to!!
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simrandewan

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Mon Jul 30, 2007 2:49 am

exactly...in love marriages,as vineet pointed out,the expectation level is high,since u know the other so person so well.n any way a love marriage is no gaurantee for happiness.both ways u have to take a chance.
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psyflyinhigh

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Mon Jul 30, 2007 2:41 pm

always for love marriages but the amazin fact is tht arranged marraige has good success rate than love marraiges but but y the arrange marriage is havin good success rates.

till now poll shows total 11 votes 10 r 4 love marrriages and just 1 for arrange marriage i thnk this is vote from nikita thnks nikita to b true to urself
out of 10 how many r really gonna do love marriage may b 2 or 3(max) and i do say the guys who did had luv marriages and r livin with der parents with der parents concern i.e.love but arrange marriage i thnk dey r goin 2 hve good succes rates.


the reason is maximum of parents r agianst love marriages. after a love marriage without parents concern we r not goin 2 hve ny sipport from our parents this is the fact tht no1 in this world can leave without fightin wenever fightin or misunderstandin strts to grow gaps gets bigger between couples in arranged marriages parents try to make the gap or misunderstandin lesser but in love marriages often frnds help but dey r not always with us thts the fact but parents r i do thnk supportin of parents decides the success rate of any marriage this is wat i thnk
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Nikhita

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Mon Jul 30, 2007 7:01 pm

well...i really wasn't being true to myself or anyone..i was just being practical!

my parents aren't really averse to love marriages or anything, nor do i think tht parents tehse days are against "love marriages"....why would any parent be against the happiness of their daughters and sons...they only disagree when they see the relationship falling apart in the future...and i think they are right most of teh times cause they are in a relationship and they know what it takes to carry it forward...when they see the same not "actually" happening with the partner their child has chosen, they object..and i truly agree with their objection..they have all the right to do that too...but yea...detesting ur child's choice just because he/she 'claims' to love the person is wrong...i think parents should give a fair chance to their children's choice....

and yea as far as your point about parents and friends trying to clear teh misunderstandings between teh couple is concerned...i personally believe that no one should be allowed to speak between a husband and wife..cause ultimately..the two of them have to live together...i believe any sort of interference from anyone just adds on to the misunderstandings...
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ady celestation



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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Mon Jul 30, 2007 7:14 pm

love marriages are certainly better...at least ur spouse is tried n tested...n liked by u in every respect...
what if u end up marrying a neat good looking iitian that your dad fixed up...n he turns out to be a dracula....
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pal_nandini

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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Mon Jul 30, 2007 10:43 pm

love cum arranged works d best guys....
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Tirthankar



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PostSubject: Re: Love Marriage vs. Arranged-which stand do u take?   Mon Jul 30, 2007 11:32 pm

difficult to say...................being in love twice i have understood the beauty and the pain of love...........but love is just a part & not the heart of love..........................besides life is long...................one should always look forward n not backward..............now marriage..........a very important part in human's life................not a child's play if improperly planned it may create ruckus or just end up in mess the inevitable result being the divorce & thus giving something to the lawyers like us to argue in the Court of law & earn their livelihood but often we forget what divorce do to the children they are the real victims.............they have to bear the menatl scur for the rest of their lives.......................
so we have to be very careful & then marry............because it involves 2 families, 2 persons & their children.............no space 4 kddin!!!!!!!!!!!!as far i am concerned i would have loved to marry my 1st love but whats gone whats gone!!!!!!
now i vl think about marry in distant future................
ppl be postive but PRACTICAL!!!!!~~~
The secret to having a good marriage is to understand that marriage must be total, it must be permanent, and it must be equal. - Frank Pittman
What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how
compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility.
Leo Tolstoy
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